Saturday, July 15, 2017

"So you lift your one leg . . . and then you lift the OTHER -- and BETWEEN them, you make a LIVIN'!!!" ~ "Chicken" to Myrtle in Tennessee Williams's "Last of the Mobile Hot-Shots":

Adapted from Tennessee's play, The Seven Descents of Myrtle, by Gore Vidal, and rated "X" when it was released in 1970, but the DVD box rates it as "R". 

I rate it as often hysterically funny -- as well as often hysterical -- slapstick comedy, and reminds me of the Christian Democrat-Republicans in both Washington and Wilmington, TODAY!!!

Myrtle is the literal last survivor of a topless all-girl musical review (I've chosen a more MODEST illustration), and Lynn Redgrave played her flawlessly. HOT is the mulatto half brother living on the decayed antebellum plantation reminiscent of a typical CRACK HOUSE in Wilmington today, with his white half-brother (James Coburn), who's dying of cancer and desperate for an heir from his new bride. But nothing is as it seems, and when Myrtle ends up oralizing "Chicken" (James Hooks), I got jealous as hell!!! Jeb Stuart Thorington is too gone with cancer and drink (and smoking more than one thing), to be attractive.

The half brothers have a history of sharing "yellow" whores -- as well as doing each other -- and in the end, the Mulatto and Myrtle WIN!!!

Could be a scene played by three characters from First Presbyterian, Wilmington, across the street from ME:

Ben is an Elder, as "Chicken" (in North Carolina, D.A.s can get away with black-face).

Judge Lindsey McKee (previously styled "Luther"), an Elder (we'll add padding) as Myrtle.

County Commission Head Beth Dawson (until THIS happened, an Elder), lends her husband to play Jeb Stuart Thorington.

Now, I think I should ADAPT this and perform it here in Wilmington -- I'm SURE Sewanee/The University of the South would grant me the RIGHTS, especially since I have such a GOOD RELATIONSHIP with their Head Counsel Donna Pierce, who since I ASK first would not threaten  me with a LIBEL (or other), lawsuit -- like she did in 2010!!!

Donna Pierce (on left), with Alabama's Official CHRISTIAN-STATE POETESS

Now for the CAST, I think part-time resident Eric Trump would be PERFECT for Jeb Stuart Thorington:

Eric likes getting kissed, no???

Pastor Robert Campbell could be bleached down a little to play "Chicken" -- and with luck Barack Obama (as a "Guest Star"), would agree to understudy him (in case Robert chickens out):

He's ALREADY got experience acting!!!

And since I can't think of any known local woman buxom enough -- and since I've ALREADY played Francis Flute in A Midsummer Night's Dream (who gets into drag to play Thisby, in a play within the play), and at the 1981 Key West Fantasy Fest I was the Amazon Adulteress (as chronicled here:, I shall play Myrtle (thus doing either the Reverend -- or the former President)!!!

And the first thought that struck me when I saw the WILD SCENE in which Myrtle and Jeb Stuart Thorington get married -- Myrtle for her lust for electrical appliances, and Jeb for a check to renovate Waverly Plantation, was that I should just FORGET talking to the FBI about Joseph Crawford Faulk, Jr. -- since he sent me such a HOOT of a film -- and he STOPPED financing Wilmington DRUG MAFIOSO Haston Lavern Caulder II.

But THEN I remembered I had bought it myself, years ago -- but Joseph financed my being able to REMAIN ALIVE for 5.5 years (despite his constant advice that would have gotten me killed -- but I paid it NO MIND). He's NOT going to send me another DIME -- despite his previous commitment to help until Spectrum Cable settles with me for hitting me with this TRUCK:

I'll QUICKLY adapt the play down to three minutes long -- and it WON'T take many rehearsals -- and then I can make LOTS OF BUCKS from the performances, and Haston Caulder and his associates can SELL TICKETS and be USHERS!!!

Haston Caulder

Dustin Andrew Goldsmith

And let us not FORGET that the play for this movie was adapted by Gore Vidal, seen here with Tennessee Williams and Sen. John F. Kennedy:

Too bad there's NO ROLE for a handsome young RED-HEAD -- like Congressman Joseph P. Kennedy III!!!:

He's such a NATURAL on a STAGE, no???

Ru-POPE would have been fun to fit in TOO.


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